A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was
a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could
not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a
copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and
say, 'There's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'that's Michael. He's a doctor.'"
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher. She's dead."
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she
said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red
in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary positions the blood doesn't run into my
A little fellow shouted, "Because your feet aren't empty."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of
the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip
cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all You want. God is watching the apples!"
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