Men & Women Differences

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 Men & Women Differences
 

MONEY

  • A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs
  • A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need because it's on sale.

BATHROOM

  • A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from a hotel.
  • The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 481. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

ARGUMENTS

  • A woman has the last word in any argument.
  • Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

NAMES

  • If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
  • If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will very likely affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy

EATING OUT

  • When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom are more likely to each throw in a $20, even though it's only for $32.50.None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want the change back.
  • When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

 

CATS

  •  Women love cats.
  • Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE

  • A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
  • A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife

SUCCESS

  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE

  • A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
  • A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

DRESSING UP

  • A woman will dress up to go 4 shopping, to water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and read the mail.
  •  A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL

  • Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
  • Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
     

OFFSPRING

  • Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,secret fears and hopes and dreams.
  • A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
     

FINAL THOUGHT

  • Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

Again, the author is unknown.  I know the differences have been blown out of proportion, but they are funny and somehow reflect some reality for some people.

 

 

 

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